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Why I haven't celebrated Valentine’s Day in the last 19 years and why every day has been the Day


My conception about love has had very dynamic changes. However, regardless of the stages of my life, from my childhood until the start of my Yoga journey, love had a meaning for me which described a feeling that I can reflect to somebody or to something, that made me feel good. I had this experience mostly with attachments, expectations, selfishness or with terms & conditions. Since Yoga became a way of life in my daily practice, Love has had a meaning of something greater and deeper than individual love, especially something bigger than romantic & sexual love. The feelings I had before were reflections of my mind after so many filters; the filters of my ego, the need of security and safety, awaiting for approval or esteem etc..


Today is Valentine’s Day in western world. It is a celebration day among the 365 days of the year that we “express” our romantic “love” to a person in our life by forgetting how mostly we set boundaries or how demanding we are towards others and ourselves. But regardless where and how we are celebrating this “special” day, if this practice is far from the understanding of what is pure in us, it does not reach to the state of an open and loving heart. Love is a path to self-realization, it is having an experience of a self-journey. When it is practised with the right alignments of attitude as we do on our mat with our bodies, it helps us to keep higher awareness of ourselves and eventually of others for staying positive and motivated in our relationship with the Universe.

What does Love mean to me?

Love is a practice coming from within; it is a practice of unity, kindness and unconditional acceptance and it begins internally with full of contentment inside. In times of not feeling loved or not loving ourselves, it leads to disconnection with the Great Love. Regardless what Great Love means to you, it is definitely not about the concept of finding the true soul-mate. Mostly we suffer and have pain as it is never enough love we have from others. When we begin to practice Love by being our best Self towards ourselves first, then it takes us to practise Love towards others. Self-care, less criticism, detachments from people, places, things and feelings, allowing less grasping and having more opportunities to express ourselves in the way who we are... Otherwise love does not have any meaning regardless how big is the bouquet we receive in a Valentine’s Day or how tight is the cuddle we‘ve just given or how strong the kiss was we just exchanged. If we don’t feel the bliss and joy inside by loving ourselves without any judgment or regret, it is not possible to give unconditional Love to others. Great Love is freeing our heart first from all the external conditions under the ethical and personal principles of 8-Limbs of Yoga. Because when we feel free from all our attachments, jealousy, irritations, judgement, alienation only then we can feel the Love deep down inside and feel peaceful and content. When we seek the Love externally, no matter how much love people shower onto us, we won’t fell that we have enough.

I have more than One single Love in my Heart

Since Yoga is a way of my life, I reflect my Love to anything fascinates me with its beauty or anything that inspires me by hitting the mark of my heart. The key is to recognise ourselves and others around us as part of the universe. Love is within us and Love is everywhere: It is in the heart of our beloved ones but also in the branches of a tree, in a tweet of a bird, in a smile of a child, in a hand movement of a stranger sitting on a bench in a park, in the thoughts of a colleague, in a walk on freshly cut grasses with bare feet, in kite flying as long as all these are seen with pure loving intentions and with kindness and compassion...

Happy Love-filled Days!

With Peace, Love & Joy

Aslihan

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